Better to Be Modest Than A Pretentious Jerk

Immediately, thoughts of Eric Clapton’s soothing hit “Change The World” come to mind. I never realized the song was by him until I looked it up on YouTube. In fact, I was listening to it briefly as I wrote this, hoping to find an inspirational message to guide me, to invoke thoughts of realizing I could make a difference.

If I could reach the stars, I’d pull one down for you
Shine it on my heart, so you could see the truth
That this love I have inside, is everything it seems
But for now I find, it’s only in my dreams

The World Through My Eyes is all about finding myself, channeling my thoughts, trying to find ideal happiness through writing. After various names that I have gone through on this blog, from using my pen name “macbofisbil”, to using “this is my journey”, to using all caps on “MACBOFISBIL”, I finally decided on a name I had come up with a while back, putting it on the top header image and now introducing it in the New Year. It is all about how I perceive the world and all about my current state in it. Through photographs and pieces of writing, whether it be poetry or trials and tribulations of fictional writing, I am getting closer to finding the real me with this blog, honing my skills, moving towards blogging zen or the Holy Grail if you may call it.

What change, big or small, would you like your blog to make in the world?

My blog was never about changing anything in the world when I first started it and now that I going on my second year of blogging, I would find it incredibly surprising if any of my writing pieces of inferior quality could even have an impact. At best, I still call myself a novice writer, still trying to find that thing that everybody loves, still trying to find my niche audience, hoping to please them every time. But that’s difficult to do, because everyone’s tastes are radically different. Some of my writing pieces (sounds more professional than ‘posts’) were good in bloggers opinions while others didn’t do as well as I hoped, didn’t strike gold, didn’t hit all the right notes to invoke a flurry of comments (not that that has ever happened, yet). Yeah, I am being modest, choosing to think of my work on an unassuming level. I like to say my writing is inspirational because I do put time and effort into it, do try to form a connection with my potential readers, some of them gradually becoming loyal followers. I have always drawn inspiration from my own life, talking about my successes and failures, my dreams, my hopes, things that interest me. I would love to have my blog make people realize their dreams can come true if you put some work and effort into making them happen. There have been failures in my life that have caused episodes of depression, replaying them in my mind over and over again, unable to shake them off, wanting to vanquish their laughter, turn them around, but I have begun to realize these failures can help make me better.

I would love to have my blog make people happy but at the same time give them something to think about, make them want to change something in their life. There has always been a dream way in the back of my mind to have my blog tell a story of the never ending struggle to find one’s inner peace, to figure out their true personality inside, to fight off the demons that constantly bombard us, trying to pull us away from our path to happiness. The unexpected intent of this blog was to paint beautiful pictures in the minds of whoever was interested in reading it.

But let’s get real here, me and this little blog of 182 followers (as of now) has as much chance of changing the world as gay marriage being accepted by the entire planet (though it is getting on the right track). I have never had expectations that high, preferring to think reasonably about myself, knowing my limitations, not wanting to sound too pretentious. Changing the world is a big way to think, unlike anything I have ever dreamed of. I’m not doing this little blogging experiment to set the human race on an entirely different way of thinking or doing. That’s absurd. Totally egotistic as well. I love to blog because it is enjoyable and a learning experience for myself. I love to use this great tool as a way to improve my writing skills and to make new fiends friends and discover people who are like me in interesting ways. Sure, I would love to think my little corner of the internet has the power to cause significant events in this world to happen, can have a ripple effect, but in all honesty, I don’t think that will happen anytime soon. I’m comfortable right now just being modest about my writing in general, not putting it too high on a pedestal, because that only results in me crashing a long way back down to earth when I can’t replicate my mere success, resulting in a feeling of failure and the onset depression that comes afterward. I hate that.

So, for now, I’m not thinking about changing the world. There are much more powerful and deserving writers and bloggers out there for that job. I feel no pressure to have my work serve as a testament to all of mankind, to make any sort of impact on the way we live and breath. It would be crazy to think a little man from a small Midwestern town, with very little money and connections, could possibly Change the World. But, as countless proverbs and inspirational pictures have said, it’s the little actions from small groups of people that can make a difference. So maybe I am doing something but I just don’t know it yet – maybe by participating in this incredible blogging experience has opened up the doors to potentially making some good in our society today. I’m sure the small group of creators behind Facebook, Google, Twitter, YouTube, and other technologies didn’t immediately think they could change the world, but look where they are now.

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Author: Macbofisbil

Welcome to "Macbofisbil: An Awesome Mind", a place where you will find all sorts of interesting stories, pictures, and advice on life in general.

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